You know those games on Facebook? The addicting ones. The ones that seem like innocent fun until you realize you spent an entire Saturday afternoon harvesting (read: clicking on) imaginary blueberries?
Maybe it was pineapples for you. Or candy. Or mob hits. Or Words with Friends. Don’t pretend you know not of what I speak!
I thought I escaped my farming addiction. After all, it’s been at least 2 years since that fateful Saturday afternoon when I deleted the whole game in disgust at my time consuming imaginary farming empire. Turns out, I’ve only graduated to real farming. Okay, maybe not REAL farming, but the keeping of 14 chickens in a farm like environment. Now... I am addicted to poultry and coops.
Getting crowded in the Little Coop.
I started out with 7 little chickens & a wee little coop. Before I knew it, my 7 chickens grew up, and they needed a bigger coop.
So, I got them a bigger coop. It was shiny and red. My chickens were happy. I called them my Scoobies.
But then, I was left with an empty little coop! What a waste! And in all seriousness, I had a bad hen:rooster ratio. 2 Roosters + 5 Hens = not enough feathers on the hens. So I got 3 more hens. But it turns out the 3 hens were actually 1 hen and 2 roosters, so I actually doubled my little rooster problem. Details. Sigh.
Lo and behold, the new 3 got along well in their little coop, and my 7 Scoobies were perfectly content ignoring them. They all free ranged in their separate tribes, and there was peace over the land.
Scoobies touring the Big Coop!
Then my 2 "big coop roosters" had a falling out. Turns out Dru does not like to share. Miraculously, I was able to add Angel to the "little coop roosters," and they did alright together, despite being 3 roosters in a little coop. Dru the Roo liked the change, and reigned over the big coop like a Ninja.
To recap, 6 chickens in big coop, 4 chickens in little coop. Happy free ranging by all, sometimes even integrated tribes.
Then came November, and the cold. My "little coop roosters" were clearly eyeing the bigger (& warmer) coop. This might have been Angel's attempt at revenge. Following zero consultation with me, the little coop birds staged a very well executed coop d'état (sic), which is a sudden deposition of a ruling rooster by a small group of the existing farm establishment to depose the extant government and replace it with another body, civil or military. A coop d'état is considered successful when the usurpers establish their dominance in the new coop. Unfortunately, for Dru the Roo, the November push was a success.
Happy Trio in the Little Coop.
To recap, 9 chickens in big coop, 1 chicken in little coop. Happy free ranging by 9, death to Dru should he try to leave his little coop.
Some might have suggested it was time for some chicken and dumplings, but Dru the Roo was particularly fluffy, so I provided him some extra chicken scratch and a few conjugal visits with his favorite hen and hoped things would calm down later.
The peace did not return to the land...
Success! Integrated flocking!
So, I went back to Westphalia Trading Co., which is having a Christmas sale, and picked up a second big shiny red coop.
I also located 4 new banty hens for my fluffy rooster, which ... Sigh... brought with them disease and plague to the land. Ok, they were sneezing. Thankfully, this was cured with 14-days of Duramycin-10.
After cure and quarantine, I dubbed the old big coop “Barn O’ Bantys” and placed the 4 new hens and the formerly lonely Dru the Roo there for safe keeping. They are quite happy now, and accept visitation from Cordie the Silkie banty hen whenever she pleases. Angel the Roo, who is also a banty, is not allowed in the “Barn O’ Bantys” on penalty of death.
2 Big Coops! The addiction spreads to barn shaped buildings!
I dubbed the new coop... nothing yet. Open for suggestions! I placed all the full-size birds in this coop (2 roosters and 5 hens).
Again, without the benefit of my consultation, these chickens proclaimed that Angel the Roo is also not allowed in the new coop, on penalty of death. Sigh. They have since agreed to amend their Constitution. They allow Angel in the coop after dark, if he stays on the high roost that they cannot reach.
OMG chickens - can you not work with me here!? Coops do NOT grow on trees!
To recap - 7 chickens in a big coop, 6 chickens in a big coop, 1 chicken that is excommunicated except at night, as long as he stays on his roost, but nonetheless will not deign to enter the lonely little coop.
Ex-communicated Angel, boycotting the Little Coop.
Do you know what this means??? I do. Based on Chicken Lawyer Math, The Chicken Lawyer needs more chickens!!